Thoughts of a 'Man'

now i'm bored again.........life before NS wasn't colourful....now, i still feel the same.......its just so plain.....i haven't lost motivation.....since feeling like this only makes me appreciate things more and look forward to every next day for what might be my impending windfall....

if i'm on the verge of dying from starvation, i will never resort to begging.....i'm not in denial, but desperation just doesn't make one look good.

humans will never be satisfied.....we will always have that something that we're waiting for......

even here, i find it hard to let it all out.....i promise to be a selfless person 5 months ago..so much so that i constantly remind myself not to talk about myself in front of ppl.....no one likes someone who goes on forever about themselves and not give others a chance to speak, since innately we all need to express ourselves..............

but when i'm emo, its just hard to pay attention to others and avoid being self-absorbed....its always easy to tell the selfish from the selfless........we can easily tell the egoistic from how much they constantly talk about themselves....they may not boast outright....but it becomes obvious....

always, these ppl are the most mentally vulnerable.....and easily misled......for they are the most self-conscious, and have the lowest self-esteem, having the need to let everyone know about their past accomplishments....if you are a salesperson, these ppl are your cashcows...............

i diverged again........anyway, i just have so mucht things that i want to do...but the short 'bookout' days just keeps getting shorter......shorter than other companies....i do not live a life of my own anymore.....well i guess all of us do not have the luxury to make that choice, to choose our genes, our looks, place of birth and so on........

................thats it.....will not go on with describing the same "emoness" with different sentences...

expressing myself doesn't seem to help anyway............gotta correct something i just said above....., its not about self-expression........its about obtaining the attention of others....what is art without admirers.......No man is an island.......constantly relying on those around us for emotional comfort............