Thoughts of a 'Man'

Now i'm back to the start.....should be studying, but due to the stupid chem paper....well stupid me actually........not much 'zest' left to take the other papers........ being sick was a contributing factor...... iwas feeling well the entire day yesterday, but until 11pm, i don't know why, my throat begin to have this sharp pain...and my nose became blocked or something......more than that, feeling fatigue and the signs of fever i guess...well just couldn't get to sleep and kept waking up in between the night.....and just felt worst and worst, and was deciding if ishould come to school at all....but then i would miss out on my paper 3 chemistry..ahhhhhhhh.......somewhere in between was a battle of conscience.......but when i decided that i must turn up for the paper, and to see her, my body gave in and i was sort of feeling better already......well, the strepsil i took helped a lot..........

well, went to school, no chances, no 'coincidence'....................................................................paper 3 well, i have to say it would have been easy if i had enough practise(we'll always be underprepared, i wonder why)............i don't want to go into which questions i've done, but anyway, it wasn't good, this time i put a little more effort into the examinations, but it wasn't enough........here goes my morale...........

...................................................went to see the doctor, so i'm not in such a good state, and i didn't take the mc when he asked me........what if it gets worst tomorrow....argh.............took some pills and coug syrup, and went to bed at 2pm.................woke up at 7 pm........wanted to wake up earlier initially to go back to school, for obvious reasons, but now its too late...haha.......i think had a little fever...but subsided due to medicine and sleep....had to sit thru dinner alone at home(my parents went for a concert) when i could be somewhere else.......was getting all emo and shit.....but even if i was there in school, i would be suffering from the symptoms......and i hate seeing ppl look pathetic, when they look so sick and frail but pretend to be putting up a fight by continuing with their daily activities, maybe to seek attention or something, causing ppl to get all worried, having to shower the person with all the attention.......... so it was better for me to be at home to save ppl the trouble of having to look at me, pathetic, and feeling miserable......

well, i guess its about time, school's closing right now...i can just imagine the students flooding out now under the night sky along the very long path to the bustop, some ppl being picked up by cars..........always felt that picture was beautiful..........its totally different from the morning, when ppl are more of rushing to the school.......at night, it signifies the end of an extremely long day......it quells the spirit, all the stress that has to be tolerated the entire day, to be let out altogether from a stroll....actually this feeling comes even if you're going home in the afternoon..lol, but i guess the night amplifies the feeling.....i'm going to miss this as school ends in about 5 weeks or so.......too bad i've been denied entry to retain............damn the teachers.........

whatever...i guess i'm going to put study till tmr.....sleep early and wake up early tmr to study...


...right now what i need most is my 'medicine'..........if you get what i mean............i won't get to have it till at least tmr.....