Thoughts of a 'Man'

I felt like i have to blog right now.....basically i avoid blogging even though i do have the urge to say something to this green page and anyone who do accidentally stumble upon here(advertisement spam maybe..) because the examinations are around the corner and i should either be resting or studying.......i switched on my comp and opened windows media player.....its constantly on shuffle..so i just let it play something in random.......This song 'tongue tied' by a band not that popular, called Farrah.........started playing....the lyrics and the title..inspired me to come here now and note how tongue tied i've been over the past many days........

Countless times i've heard this song ages ago, but i merely appreciated it for its cheery melody...tongue-in-cheek lyrics......but i never really understood how it felt........maybe i did, but i just wasn't familiar with it to identify myself in that situation.....but now.....

there are no transcription of the lyrics...so i'll just give the relevant parts here..

Tongue tied......inside so shy.....(the dots are the words that i'm not sure about...)......There were so much that i should have said. when i tried, the words died. And when you looked at me i didn't swallow, and then you turned away, i felt so hollow...................

you get the idea......i really think ppl will view me as retarded....yes, as psychotic as an ass........

Anyway, my hair really didn't make it this time......the fringe is disgusting and i feel like an idiot...i generally do not care about my hair....but this certainly is not the hair i want when i'm dead and in my coffin.......i've never talked about it much so i guess i'll just talk about it here....always felt having random and different shapes on my head were more like experiments to me..its just a perspective i have about change and overcoming it like a challenge, instead of being secure with your environment.......and it will be amusing especially when i look at the mirror and start laughing at it or just point the finger at myself....i remember shaving my head the other time for the team.......it was great experience....that came with great sacrifice..cos it looked like shit.....sometimes when you think about it while walking in public, you may have that refreshing feeling, like throwing your life away, or being something someone else.......or most times, don't think about it at all.......

....shall just end here...got many stuff to talk about, but of not much importance.....or i'm not in the mood coz my mind has not been thinking about anything much anymore......its into hibernation mood for the examinations, school life, trying to do all that homework or that distraction......consider my brainwaves being concentrated into a 'laser', unidirectional, monochromatic,(if i'm not wrong) in phase?....