Thoughts of a 'Man'

anyway, these few days had been quite peaceful....i've injured my leg, took half and hour to reach school, now takes me 50 mins....what took me 3 mins to walk to the mrt now takes me 15 mins..every step is like...eh..'ARGH!H!' ..and, i've been faced with test back to back to back...and i have another one tmr....me kind of have 'longterm' problems with ppl around me too...sounds really stress and hectic....

but i accepted everything, and found inner peace...if you face your life with composure, it'll be a breeze...the chinese say 'xin jing zi ran liang'....when the heart is quiet, you'll naturally feel cool..(direct translation)....everytime i start thinking about my problems, i watch tv or simply went to sleep, took my mind off things....and with preview channel of cable, i've watched more tv in a day than the whole of last month..ppl call the media 'pollution'....for me its more of 'enlightenment'....(don't want to go all about this again, but i've written about it twice, and don't want to repeat myself..)..

anyway, talking about accepting life...i guess, its like giving up eh....accepting the torture, is like giving up trying to be avoid it, since you can't...recently(some weeks now), i made the conclusion that, life is not about acheiving your dreams...its deciding what to do after giving up those dreams...always, 'stars', the rich and famous, were just lucky.... it wasn't about their passion...most of us are forced to give up our dreams anyway, what happens next is reality.. choose to throw your life away, or make every single day worth it...the way of the buddha, no desire andyou'll have satisfaction...i preceive that, the prince(?) that sat under the bodhi tree thinking of his purpose, probably gave up, and was satisfied to conclude that life had no purpose and no desire...he couldn't find what he was looking for, and gave up, feeling that he would be happier if he stopped looking...

i have to begin this 'live no life' ritual soon to prepare for my o lvls...don't tell me to get a life k, coz 'no life=study with passion' quoted from once a really close friend, now merely holding a little respect for each other's,as we've been a small part in each other's lives...
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anyway, what if 'anonymous' turns out to be some adult i know..lol...so cliche....(like some parent checking on me)....though i know its not any of my parents....but, thx for the advises, though if you're ever tempted to budge into my life....don't...somethings are best left to 'nature', and for myself to make mistakes learn from them, if this mistakes are prevented or solved by another party, i'll never learn...

and if you happen to be someone close, don't worry k?....
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hey yo shanism!...i'm back....you too!...lol..